Surviving Two Under Two

I must say having two children under the age of two was quite a shock to the system. I never really appreciated just how easy having one baby was. I have always prided myself on being quite a punctual person and now I frequently find myself apologizing for running late.

Having said that, I feel like 7 weeks into having 2 babies I am really getting into the swing of things - thanks to four key ingredients. Together they make up my survival kit:

1. Espresso Machine
I can honestly say this is one of the greatest purchases we have ever made. Before Dominic was born I was quite addicted to Starbucks coffee. I was spending between $12-16 per week on coffee - easy to do when they cost $4 a drink. With one baby, running into Starbucks to pick up a coffee was fairly easy to do, but with two it was not even worth the stress and hassle. However, all new moms know that coffee is an essential component for daily function. Having my espresso machine at my fingertips, with Starbucks grounds and syrups, makes every sleep-deprived morning a happy morning. Plus we are saving a small fortune!

2. Baby Carrier
I think I have used my baby carrier more in the 7 weeks since Dominic was born than the whole time I have had Natalie. Boys - or at least my boy - seem a lot more clingy and needy than girls. Natalie seemed quite happy to sit in her swing or bouncy chair and observe while I got on with things. Dominic, on the other hand, needs to be held constantly. As long as he is close to me in his carrier he is happy. It not only allows me to get things done - like making breakfast or lunch for Natalie - but it also allows me to take Natalie out and about and have my hands free.
I have used the Bjorn, Infantino, Ergo and Belle Baby Carriers. I think it is essential to have a carrier with a strap that goes around the waist/hips and not just over the shoulders. I got terrible back ache using the Bjorn and wouldn't recommend it. I love the Belle Baby carrier. It folds up into a small bundle that easily fits into my diaper bag and Dominic can face in, toward me, or when he gets better head control he can face the world. The Ergo is good for cold climates because the baby is very snuggly in the infant insert. If you live somewhere warm I would only use the Ergo for an older child. It's extremely comfortable though and I have never had back ache with it, even carrying a 19lb-er around.

My Belle Baby carrier and the Espresso Machine

3. Good Girlfriends
There is nothing like a good support system to get you through anything. I feel like whenever I venture out into public with my girlfriends I have an extra pair or eyes and hands with me. In the absence of family I have also relied heavily on my girlfriends to watch Natalie for me whenever we have had to take Dominic for doctors appointments. But best of all if the kids go crazy and have meltdowns at the same time, I know my girlfriends and I will end up laughing about the madness. Nothing seems as hard or as bad when they are around. Much love to you Christina and Bethany!

4. Nickelodeon Jr.I always swore I would never be the type of parent who used the television to babysit my children. I also swore I would never use a pacifier. It's amazing how things change when all you want is 20 minutes of peace and quiet. Thank you Olivia, Dora and Diego for entertaining my 20 month old while I feed, change and console her newborn brother.

Also, a word of advice. If your husband is planning to take a month off work, like mine did, please encourage him not to. Men are not built like women, they can't deal with the stress and multitasking that comes with 2 under 2 and you will find yourself worrying about 3 people instead of just the 2 kids. I have found it a lot easier to get into a routine with my husband back at work. Men are not that helpful ;-) Plus instead of being permanently stressed out, he comes home from work happy, I am happy that I don't have to worry about his mental health - so all in all everyone is happier. I should probably list that as survival tip #5...make sure daddy goes back to work asap ;-)

Things Fall Apart

The birth of a baby is supposed to bring tears of joy and happiness. On Feb 4, 2011 I learned that the birth of a baby can also bring on other tears. I cried almost non-stop for a week after my sweet boy was born.

My pregnancy with Dominic was harder than my first pregnancy, but I have heard this is not unusual. I had more sickness and more achiness, but other than that it was fairly uneventful. All of our ultrasounds came back completely normal as did all my bloodwork. We expected a perfect, healthy little baby boy, just like our perfect little girl we had 2 years earlier.

After an 11.5 hour labor and very short delivery Dominic Joshua Cook was born. A beautiful 8lb 4oz baby boy, Dominic was born with several marks all over his face. It looked like half of his face had bad bruising and he also had a dark mark under his nose.

At first we were told it was bruising but it soon became clear the mark under his nose was some sort of birthmark. Typically, I consulted Google which told me it was a "stork bite", a mark commonly found under the nose which fades in time. While upset that his newborn pictures wouldn't look as perfect as I had imagined, I was relieved that Google diagnosed him with something that would fade in time. Little did I know that Google isn't always right.

The day after Dominic's birth the pediatrician at the hospital diagnosed him with Port Wine Staining. Not only was the mark under his nose not going to fade, but the "bruising" across half of his face was not going to fade either. The pediatrician referred us to a plastic surgeon. This news was devastating but, nothing could prepare me for what followed. The pediatrician said that the staining of the birthmark could indicate "staining" on his brain, a condition called Sturge-Weber syndrome, a disorder characterized by seizures, glaucoma and developmental delays. Dominic would need to undergo an MRI to rule out this syndrome.

A week after his birth we were at the plastic surgeons office. He said he did not want to begin laser treatments until Dominic was cleared of Sturge-Weber syndrome as he would have to be sedated for each treatment. He referred us to a pediatric neurologist and pediatric opthalmologist. A week later we had appointments with both these specialists.

Dominic's eyes checked out well, he did not have increased pressure in either of his eyes. He'll return every 3 months to get them checked. The trip to the neurologist wasn't quite as straightforward. At first he wanted to do an MRI right away, but after doing a lot of research I discovered that any MRI done before the age of 1 would be inconclusive. Dr Comi at the Sturge-Weber Center up in Baltimore suggests doing an EEG in infants under the age of 1 and an MRI at age one. If the MRI at age 1 comes back normal the child is cleared of having the syndrome.

Dominic had an EEG on March 11, 2011. They connected 26 electrodes to his head and shone a strobe light into his eyes. 

The EEG results were normal. I wish this meant something but unfortunately all it means is that at this very moment his brain activity is normal. It is not a conclusive test and does not give us any indication that it will remain normal. All we can do while we wait for the conclusive MRI is monitor him for "strange" or seizure activity and carry on with life as normal. Easier said than done.

I find that the more time that passes, the easier it is becoming to lead a normal life. However, every doctors appointment we attend brings back intense stress and worry. Sometimes I think it would be easier to bury my head in the sand and pretend nothing is going on. The thought of something being wrong with my beautiful boy is something I am not willing to accept. He has to be OK. No matter what happens I know we, as a family, will be fine and Dominic will always be deeply loved and cared for. But he, like any child, deserves to be healthy. He has already seen more doctors than any 7 week old should ever have to see.

Dominic started smiling at 6 weeks old. His smile lights up my day. He is a wonderful little man and a real mommy's boy. To my great surprise he also started rolling over at 6 weeks. The reason this was such a surprise is because Natalie, his sister, did not roll over until she was NINE MONTHS OLD!!!! So far Dominic is meeting all his milestones and doing really well, but we still have a long road ahead of us. All we can do for now is have hope and faith that he will be fine.